Clarity

everything is falling into place. digital weakness is starting to fall short. separating the truth from her common deceit. it's been months now since i knew you, or knew what you thought you were at the time. i've cleaned up, sharpened my senses and held my love deep inside for long enough; robbing a deserving bird the opportunity to fly. but all i can say is i knew you before, you were beautiful back then; before you grew up, before you gave in. i'd like to say there are no harsh feelings, but that would be a lie.

i haven't been this happy or self-sufficient in my entire life. without substance abuse, without dependency, without anxiety or depression. balanced. the colours are vivid and pure; the nights free and clear.

you dreamed of sharing your heart, instead you shared your bed. and your heart beats empty and cold, with all the tears that you have shed. you dream of baring your soul, instead you bare more skin; and you wear dark glasses to keep anyone from looking in.

xxxxxxo

i'm sorry for the confusion. time to myself is all i needed. self-isolation to work my shit out. everything is beautiful now, everything is illuminated. and the taste of your kiss left me breathless and giddy like the first time. i don't know where your head is at, but i want nothing more than to make up the lost time.